--:-- Host: Hello everyone and welcome back to the show. We have a tremendous conversation for you with Belle Rape. Belle is a branding specialist. She helps you find your brand, find your style, and earn what you are worth. Belle is an incredibly dynamic individual. This is a wonderful conversation.
--:-- Host: If you are struggling to make a connection with your audience, with your prospects, with your marketplace, with your peers, inside your industry, oftentimes it's because your brand is misaligned with what you are trying to achieve. Belle helps you find that connection. You're going to love this episode. It is packed full of both high-level insights and ideas as well as tactical guides to get your brand where it needs to be to earn what you are worth. You're going to love Belle Rape just as much as I loved this conversation. With that, let's get on to Belle Rape.
--:-- Host: I know I should have hit record. When I was researching for the show, I was watching a YouTube video of a show that you were on, and they did that thing where you were sitting down getting your cup of coffee, and they said, "You didn't realize." And I have a cat now for some reason. So for everyone listening at home, if you hear a random meow in the background, it's because I now have a cat. I'm not necessarily a cat person—nothing against that, just not necessarily. But my girlfriend got a cat. She brought the cat here, and my children fell in love with the cat. So then she was like, "I can't take this cat away from your kids." So now the cat is with me.
--:-- Guest: So then did she have to get another cat? Is that how that worked?
--:-- Host: No, it just gives her a reason to visit.
--:-- Guest: Because you're not enough.
--:-- Host: All right, let's get into the interview. So I have my first question for you. You say on your website that leaving corporate was an act of reclaiming yourself. I would love for you to talk about exactly what that means and why you felt that way.
--:-- Guest: Yeah, absolutely. Well, first of all, thanks so much for having me on. We talked about before we started that we kind of match. And intentionally, I want to be like, yeah, right. I called Ryan. I didn't call him and tell him what to wear, and he didn't call me. So I really love this. And that kind of conversation, I never could have gotten away with in corporate America, but that's my personality.
--:-- Guest: So I say, yeah, I am a corporate dropout. I used to be so ashamed of that because I felt like I just completely failed at my last corporate job. Part of that was, yes, I lost my identity. I was trying to fix myself into this. It was a classic square peg, round hole situation. Every day for three and a half years, I was trying to be something that a leader in a position I was never meant to be in. The position was never meant for me. I took it because it kind of seemed like the right fit at the right time. I was chasing money. I was like, "I can do this." And after I got into it, it was just drudgery. I was just like, "I can't continue to do this." I truly lost myself in that position trying to find and figure out something that I was never meant to be.
--:-- Guest: That is heartbreaking, especially if you're someone who is type A, a go-getter, very driven, never says no. I had no boundaries either. That was another part of losing myself. I was working seven days a week, which is stupid. Dumb. I mean, dumb. As passionate as I am about the work that I do now, and I love what I do, I don't work seven days a week because your girl needs a rest. Everybody needs a rest. So, yeah, I was just so unbelievably lost. I'm so fortunate that I was able to reverse engineer finances and what I was doing to be able to leave that job, thankfully. Thankfully, thankfully. And figure out who I am again.
--:-- Host: The good news is that you're in good company. I also have dashed myself up against the rocks of corporate America multiple times, only to realize that I was not built for that world. To your point, what I found myself doing was getting good at playing the corporate game versus getting good at what I was supposed to be doing in my role. It was like, "How do I play politics around this person? How do I position myself here so that the thing that I want gets done?" Not, "Let me create the best thing in the position that I was in. Let me focus on my work. Let me dial in." It's, "Okay, if I want to get this little thing here and take this territory and add more headcount, I got to come around here and smooth this part." I found the same thing. I'm like, "I don't want to do an oily thing. Most of these people are assholes. I don't want to kiss this guy's butt. I don't want to go to her cocktail party. I don't want to be on this task force." I hated every second of it.
--:-- Host: The part that I would love for you to dig in a little more is I also felt shame when not fitting into that world. I felt like, "Well, all the people I admire have these CMO positions or CEO of this company, and that's how you get known and that's how people respect you." When I couldn't fit into that world after multiple tries, I had that shameful feeling of, "What's wrong with me?" So how did you come through that? Was it good mentors? Did you do mindset work? How did you come through that natural evolution of feelings to get to where you are today?
--:-- Guest: Oh man, you hit the nail on the head. You just reminded me of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. Clark Griswold is wrapping up his last few days of the year, getting ready to go on Christmas vacation. The big boss comes by with all the peons following him in a row. He starts out like, "Yeah, Merry Christmas. Happy holidays. Happy Hanukkah. Happy Kwanzaa." All the things. He gets to the end of the line and he's like, "Kiss my ass." I'm like, that's how it goes. That's how it goes. I feel like it's such a game. I found myself talking differently to different people in the company. I'm like, "Why can't it just be me? I just want to be me."
--:-- Guest: So, Ryan, I kid you not. When I left that job, I put my head in the sand for a few weeks. I just kind of sat on the couch and I was like, "I can't Belle right now. I'm not even at my best to Belle enough." That is not me. I needed to rest. I allowed myself that grace period just to rest. Thankfully, I was able to do that. My husband and I don't have children, so I didn't have that to contend with. Being a parent is hard. It is hard. I was able to feed myself, clothe myself, take care of the basic necessities, and figure it out. I know that was all God's planning. It was his divine timing. It was his plan for my life to be able to do that.
--:-- Guest: After a couple of weeks, I was like, "OK, I know I can do this again." So I started networking again and talking to people. The more I was really open and honest with how I was feeling, the more of those similar stories started coming out. I started talking to more entrepreneurs and people who were really trying to break out of the corporate world. I started asking those deeper questions. I wasn't afraid anymore to ask those deeper questions. I wasn't afraid anymore to be like, "What if? What if I leave? What if I fail? What if I tank?" I started asking them, "How are you feeling? How does this make you feel?" I wanted to really get to the core of finding my tribe.
--:-- Guest: Honestly, we all want to find someone who is similar to us. Please acknowledge that my feelings are legit. Legitimize my feelings right now of what I'm going through. If it's not okay, then tell me how I could be feeling in the moment. What was your experience? So I started asking more of those questions. I allowed myself to rest. Then I put myself back out there, and by the grace of God, I got positions like contract jobs, which was great. I was like, "Oh, I think I can do this."
--:-- Guest: And then, bro, let me just say it—COVID hit. Had I known that COVID was coming, I probably would not have had enough gumption to leave my job. I would have still been there. I would have suffered through it. But I just took it as an opportunity. The world is shutting down. I can figure out a business to make this work now because I know I can do my job from just about anywhere. You don't need me sitting in your office. You don't need me to hold down real estate that you don't want to pay for anyway to do my job with excellence. So I got my feelings validated, had a good cry, got a snack, put my big girl panties on, straightened my crown, and kept going.
--:-- Host: I don't know how I didn't know this before, but there's one phrase in the Bible that is written 365 times: "Do not be afraid." I don't think that 365 times is a coincidence. Every day, do not be afraid. He will guide you. The fact that faith is such a large part of both your business and your life is incredible. I hope more people have the strength, the guts to talk about their faith and to integrate their faith into their business, whatever that may be. I try to as much as I possibly can. How has faith played a role in guiding this new chapter? It's all over your website. It's part of your message. I've heard you mention it many times in other places. It's obviously a huge part of your life. How do you use your faith to guide you through becoming an entrepreneur, coming out of the corporate world?
--:-- Guest: Yeah. In the corporate world, it really wasn't something that I was open to talking about as much. It was kind of poo-pooed. It was never a hard-written state or rule like, "Do not talk about your faith. Do not talk about your beliefs." It just wasn't something that I felt like I could be super open about. No one was really receptive to it. But it really dawned on me one day when I was listening to another podcast. I can't even tell you what it was. I listen to so many podcasts and so many books. There was a phrase in it that said, "At the end of our life, we all want to get to that point where you get to the pearly gates and you hear God say, 'Well done, my good and faithful servant.'" Done is still action. I knew that I had to continue taking action on my life. There was still so much to be done. I just didn't know what. Maybe this is it. I feel like I hit the jackpot doing what I do right now.
--:-- Guest: Because I get to talk about my faith, I get to be open about that. I've lost followers. I know there are clients that I haven't gotten because of it. I don't care. I don't care because at the end of the day, I know I'm going to be provided for. I'm still alive. I'm healthy. If I weren't alive, I know where I'm going, which is not a bad place to be either. I'm going to heaven. Really? Not bad. So I try to take that step back and take a hard look at what my life looks like without my faith and without my religion. I'm dust. I'm dead. There's nothing. When I get to talk about my faith and my religion, I know that I light up. I get to ignite myself and ignite others to have that ability to go out and do what they were designed and created to do.
--:-- Guest: I was designed and created to do this. When I work on personal brands with my clients, I get to ignite them to go out and do what they were designed to do. When I put it in those terms, they completely understand it. We're all matches. When you strike a match, that is your personal brand coming to life. Then you have this confidence in what you are doing and who you are, which could be the backbone. You lean on your faith, you lean on your family, you lean on your friends. That gives you that confidence to shine even brighter, to go out and illuminate the world that we are in. There's so much darkness. Why contribute to that darkness when we are all light? Go and be a light and do what you were designed to do. So I get to talk about my faith, and it's an honor. It's a blessing. We're called to talk about our faith as Christians. We're called to build God's kingdom. So I have a platform, and I'm going to do it.
--:-- Host: I love that. One of the things that I find so interesting about people who have not embraced branding, have not built a brand, who fight the idea of doing that type of work—even what I think is kind of derivative work, which is marketing—it's very tough to do marketing without a brand. Almost impossible. It often doesn't work. You're just kind of wasting dollars. When people ask me about it, and I'm not a branding expert in any regard—my side is much more on the tactical marketing side, I've been a CMO and a CEO—it's such a struggle for me because to me, brand is so obvious. When people ask me about it, I'm like, "It's a filter. It's the filter."
--:-- Host: You want to know why you have crappy clients? Because your brand isn't strong. You want to know why people struggle to buy from you? Because your brand isn't strong. You want to know why your closing message doesn't connect with prospects, with vendors, with partners? Because your brand isn't strong. When your brand is strong, clear, and actually is a representation of who you are or your business, then the people who connect with that message just self-select in. They're like, "Yes, that's the one right there. That's me. I want that." Whether it's filling a gap in their life that they don't have, or it just immediately connects with who they are. It's so obvious to me, but so many people struggle to grasp that concept.
--:-- Host: Why do you think that is? Why is it that companies will spend $100,000 on a marketing campaign with a brand that's mushy and gray and all over the place and antiquated, and then they wonder why they're getting this terrible ROI when no one knows what to connect to? You spend money on a fancy graphic for a Facebook ad. Do you think that's just going to change everything? What is it about the concept of branding that feels like people either get it or they don't? How do we start to turn the people that don't into believers?
--:-- Guest: Right. That is an amazing question. I think people still, in two parts, think branding is for influencers. They're like, "I don't want to be the Kardashians. I don't want to be the next Brady family or whatever that influencer is." They don't think that they want to be that influencer status. When I say influencer status, I don't want that either. I want to have a super strong brand that magnetizes my tribe, my audience of people towards me. I want to be attracted to them. I want to fill the gap of what they need, which is what you said.
--:-- Guest: I think the pendulum is starting to swing a little bit more towards a more positive sentiment of having a personal brand because the statistics are getting out there. 74 to 75% of Americans trust someone with a personal brand. The higher the trust need, the more you need to have a personal brand. What I mean by that is, if you're going to hire a doctor, dentist, or lawyer, most of the time the first place someone is going to go is your social media or look for you on a website. They want to know who you are. If I'm going to have a surgeon cut me open, I want to know that they're not hanging out in the club the night before. I don't need someone trying to cut me open with a laser with a shaky hand. I want to know who they are. What kind of bedside manner do you have? What's your reputation? Your personal brand is your foundation of who you are.
--:-- Guest: Most people still have that idea that they don't need a personal brand because they aren't an entrepreneur. They aren't a small business owner. They don't have a product or service that they're selling for themselves. In fact, the opposite is so true. If you're sitting in a job in a cubicle, if you ever have any hopes or aspirations of moving to a higher position, you need a personal brand because you need to start developing that voice within you and have a public place to share your expertise. You need to show that you're an expert in the industry.
--:-- Guest: I also think that having a personal brand is extremely important for teenagers. I have nieces and nephews who are teenagers now. While I'm not a huge advocate for them being on social media—we can talk about that in a little bit, because social media can be very dangerous—it is a way for them to start building their digital footprints and their digital resume. They need to do it in a way that is well thought out, starting when they are young. I didn't have social media growing up. Thank the Lord. I didn't have social media growing up because so many stupid things would have been captured. That stuff follows you. It's never permanently erased. If you want to get into college, get that job—I've turned down people for jobs because they looked great on paper on their resume, but I looked at their social media and I was like, "Nope, nope, nope. I can't work with that, and I'm not going to."
--:-- Guest: Developing your personal brand is the foundation of who you are. It allows you to show your expertise in whatever industry you want to be in, to talk about, to show. Your marketing is all the pretty things. It's the aesthetics of your brand, which will rarely, if ever, be right if you don't have your personal brand completely solidified. It just won't. You can spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on your logo like you were talking about, but it just won't be right unless you know who you are. Your personal brand is your...
--:-- Host: I love your idea of almost like brand training for teenagers, that they have a clear picture. The company I just exited from in November of last year, we were constantly hiring. I never wanted to see a resume. I just assumed that if you're interviewing for the job, you're probably a reasonably intelligent human being. It was the insurance industry, so the bar is pretty low. Sorry to all my insurance friends. But what I wanted to see was, "Who is this person? Are they going to come in and be a problem? Are they going to go all wokey on us when they get in here? Are they going to cause problems? Are they going to take a ton of time off?" We're a startup. In a company of a thousand, that's perfectly fine. But this is grind time for us. When we're hiring people, we're telling them, "You're not going to work seven days a week. I completely agree. But you're going to have to put in a solid 45, and those 45 are going to have to be dedicated hours. You can't be screwing around. We need to get things done."
--:-- Host: We could go to their social media profiles and get a real clear picture. Maybe they work out a lot. Maybe they have a hobby they're super into. I don't need to know you're great at the thing I need you to do today because I can train you for that. I need to know you have the skills, character, and qualities of someone who can become good at my company. Today, especially for hiring, that is more important than the actual skills for the job. Obviously, if you're blasting rockets into space, you need to be a rocket scientist. But outside of certain very technical professions, most things can be trained or learned. What we really need to know today is, "Who are you? What am I getting?"
--:-- Host: In a remote world—and I'd love your feedback on this—your brand oftentimes goes hand in hand with your culture. If it doesn't, that causes all kinds of problems. But if it does, your brand goes hand in hand with your culture. So if you have a brand that represents who you are, and that matches the culture, then the types of people that want to work in that environment are the ones that interview. I have a lot of friends that say, especially in the insurance industry—I came out of the insurance industry, that's kind of the industry I've been in for the last 20 years, and every little boy's dream, just so you know—the problem is you develop this arcane language. There's a language to insurance that once you learn it, it doesn't apply anywhere else. It's not transferable in any regard because the words don't matter. But here's my point.
--:-- Host: I have all these friends and people, and I get asked to speak a lot. They'll be like, "You say all the time that hiring is easy." I was like, "Yeah, hiring was easy." They're like, "Wow, we can't find anybody. There's no good talent out there." I was like, "That's because your brand blows. Who would want to work there? Look at it. Your logo looks like it was made by a dot matrix machine in the 70s. Your office smells like mothballs. Your building hasn't been updated since the 90s. Who's like, 'I can't wait to go work at that place. That place looks awesome.' Your social media stinks or is non-existent. No one knows what they're getting, so they don't want to come in." I would love for you to expand upon your thoughts on all of this little diatribe I went on. I'd love for you to connect this idea of brand and culture and how it equates to the people that we ultimately find.
--:-- Guest: Yeah. I said it previously: your brand attracts your tribe. As much as we think we're business to business or business to consumer, we're still human. We have to have that human interaction. We were designed that way. God designed us that way, very specifically, to want that human interaction. I think the pandemic elevated or escalated that in a manner that we crave that human connection. Whether we're in the same office space or not, we still crave that human connection. I love having Zoom calls with clients because you see parts of the expression when you actually get to see someone versus just talking to them.
--:-- Guest: Having a brand and having a well-curated brand of what you see on your social media feed is what you're expecting to get also. You want to be real. You want to be authentic. There definitely has to be that connecting point. You don't want to meet someone in person and be like, "This is not connecting the dots for me at all." So you want to make it seem as appealing as possible to your audience. Part of your brand is knowing your audience. Your brand is not to serve you. It's not to serve Belle. My brand, Belle, is not to serve Belle. Ryan's brand is not to serve Ryan. It is to serve other people. What you do is a service. It is a product for other people. You've got to keep that in mind because that's the way that you attract the people who want what you have to offer, whether it's a service or product.
--:-- Guest: The fact is, I'm not doing anything revolutionary. How I do it is revolutionary because I'm the only one doing it the way that I do it. The same with you. I'm attracting the people who are like-minded, who have something that they want to engineer, re-engineer, or reconfigure within themselves because they see something in me that they want a part of if they're not already like it. Or I attract people who are like me. They're like, "I have this. I just don't know how to bring it out on social media." We all want that human attraction. It is that human attraction that really brings us together. If we're not serving others and showing up in that way, we're never going to attract them. So do it in an attractive manner to attract other people.
--:-- Guest: Everybody's attractive manner is different. Mine is, I put some mascara on and lip gloss on, and I love clothes, so I dress in a way that attracts my audience. Your audience is different. Everyone's audience is different.
--:-- Host: They are seemingly okay with me wearing a dirt brown sweatshirt. A lot of you movie people. Although I think we agreed it's called Earth Tones.
--:-- Guest: The Earthy Tones.
--:-- Host: I want the audience to stop for a second and go back. I'd love for you to expand on this thought because this is so powerful and I love the way you put it. What you're doing isn't what makes you unique. It's how you do it because it's specific to you. Can you expand on that particular thought? I think that nuance is so incredibly important and very powerful.
--:-- Guest: Yeah. There are thousands of other people out there doing what I do, honestly. Again, I'm not Elon Musk. I don't have that brain. I'm not sending rockets into space. I'm fine with that. But I am one Belle. I'm only one Belle. So how I do something truly is my personality. It's how I come to life. It's how I get to illuminize myself so that I can then shine that light onto other people. It's what sets me apart. It's my uniqueness because of my personality. It's how I speak. It's the tone that I speak. I'm a little bit jovial with most of my life, and I'm bubbly. So I attract those people who want that. Consequently, I repel the people who don't want that.
--:-- Guest: That repelling was a lot of what happened in the corporate world. I did great in an agency environment. I worked in an ad agency environment, and I did great there because we were so creative, we were always thinking, and there were a lot of other people in that environment like me. We were all like-minded, and we got the job done. But in a corporate environment, the corporate environments that I was in were a little bit more buttoned up, and that was really confining to me. I wasn't able to really have the Belle personality every day and in every situation that I wanted. I knew there was something that I was repelling. Internally, I was repelling it. I knew that came out in an external manner.
--:-- Guest: So, back to your original question, we're not doing anything that's super original, but it's how we do it. It's our personality that comes to life. We allow your personality to come to life, and you're going to attract the people who want to be attracted to you and who want what you have to offer.
--:-- Host: Yeah, it's funny. I think I want to share an anecdote with you because it's my show, so I can do whatever I want. No, I'm just kidding. Well, yes, but no. I didn't mean that. But I think, talking to the corporate environment piece, and there are a lot of people that listen to the show who are ambitious, driven people who are stuck in corporate situations. I'm sharing this story so that they understand. I think a lot of times corporate environments will suck you in because they'll tell you, "Hey, we love how you're bubbly. We love your energy. We love your viewpoint on the world. We need that here." I think they honestly believe it when they say it. I'm talking about "they" as this big entity, because the people who live and are successful in those environments, particularly the middle and lower levels, oftentimes have assimilated like the Borg, and it becomes this groupthink methodology.
--:-- Host: What's funny is, my company that I told you I exited from in November, the company that purchased me, when they purchased me, that was the pitch that I got.
--:-- Host: You're honest, you're upfront, you think forward, visionary, all this kind of stuff. You have these unique ideas on how things should be done. And they said, "We've been around for 50 years and we need that. We need that in here." So they added me to the executive team and I got invited to one executive meeting. And then I was never asked back.
--:-- Host: In that meeting, I'm sitting there and this is my first one. I'm like, "Oh, I want to contribute. I want to be part of the team." And I also can't help myself. My brain is broken in a lot of ways. One of those ways is I can't not participate. If I have a thought that I think can add value, it's probably a better corporate move to just keep that shit to myself. But I can't do that.
--:-- Host: So they roll out this new brand and they're all so excited. It costs hundreds of thousands of dollars. And it was fucking terrible. It was the worst, god-awful, lack of energy. It's what I imagine the guys who really need those ED pill commercials deal with every day. That's what I think of when I think of this brand — a guy struggling with ED. There's just no gumption. Not to get gross. I don't know why that's the example that came to my head. I apologize. But it was just weak. There was nothing to it.
--:-- Host: So they go through the whole thing, and I stood up and I said, "I kind of like the original brand better." And they're like, "What?" And I was like, "Yeah, it's old, and it looks like it was made in the 80s, but it's also got a ton of character. Everybody knows it. It's immediately recognizable. It's been around for 50 years. I think we could play on how it has 17 different features to it. It's this weird thing, but it's got some personality. This new one has no personality. No one is going to look at that and feel emotionally connected to it."
--:-- Host: Then I sat down. And it was like I just dropped a bomb. No one knew what to say. Everyone was looking around. And I started to get that feeling of, "I probably should have kept my mouth closed." Because someone in the hallway was like, "You know, that was really, really bold of you to come in like that." They were trying to pump me up, and I'm like, "That means I'm fucked. I'm completely screwed. It was not the right thing to do. I should have never shared my opinion." And then I was never invited back to another meeting.
--:-- Host: But it's funny, to your point, I think I have two thoughts on that. At the time, I initially felt bad. Not because I felt like I had hurt the people's feelings who created the brand. It's not their fault that they did a terrible job. I think they were probably given a groupthink vision and they were trying to mash that vision the best they could. The work product they came out with was god awful and still is. But I didn't want to make them feel bad. I thought I was helping. And I think I could have conveyed the message better.
--:-- Host: But what I took away — and this goes to your branding — is that this is who I am. They wanted this. This is who I am. They got exactly what they wanted. And if they don't actually want it and they don't invite me back again, I'm going to be okay with that. Because I'm not going to make the mistake that I made in previous lives where I succumbed to the Borg and allowed myself to be boxed in. I'd rather be the black sheep than fit in with the crowd and buy along like everyone else.
--:-- Host: You have taken that and created this amazing brand. And guys, if you go to Belle's website and check out the work that you do and how you present yourself, it's phenomenal. How do the people who believe what we're talking about — they're bought in, they're listening to you, they believe it — where do they start? How do they start to reclaim themselves? Maybe they don't have the full power today to go all the way. They're not just going to jump out of their corporate job today. They want to get started. They want to start to build. And I know you're not advocating for that, but they want to get started. How would you — is it start playing around with an Instagram channel? Is it maybe start journaling? How do they start to get their hands around what they would want their brand to be and play around with it a little bit?
--:-- Guest: Yeah. Well, let me back up just a second. There was something you said that really hit me. It just like, "Oh, stick a knife in and twist it and pour salt in it and all the things." First of all, if someone asks you your opinion on something, they have got to be prepared for what you say. You can have your delivery be honest and kind. I learned that one the hard way in my 20s because I did something very similar.
--:-- Guest: I was in an ad agency and the designers asked me what I thought of an ad. I was just like, "Yeah, I don't get it." I could have been a little bit more tactful. But I just said, "I don't get it." And they were like, "What do you mean you don't get it?" And I was like, "I don't get it. I know the brand, but I don't understand what you're trying to say with this ad." Again, I could have been a little bit more tactful, but I knew I hurt their feelings. These were senior designers, they'd been around the block many times, created award-winning campaigns, and this just missed the mark. They restarted.
--:-- Guest: But if someone asks your opinion, give them what you think and be kind. You can still be honest and kind in your delivery. If you're not invited to any more meetings, fine. But I was just so triggered by what you said, because I have done the same thing so many times. I haven't been invited back to those meetings. And my feelings were hurt because I wasn't invited back. But I've since had time to reflect and go, "I wasn't invited back because I gave them my opinion. I'm not a yes man."
--:-- Guest: If you want to hire me to work on your personal brand, I will be friends with you. I will love you. I am your biggest cheerleader because I want you to succeed. But I am not your yes man. I have done that for so many years and I know what it's like for people just to say yes to me. And I'm like, "No, I want you to be honest." So always be honest. You've got to be honest with yourself.
--:-- Guest: So let me answer your question. If you feel like you have something else in you — if there's another product or service that you want to go in on — start small. Look through your Instagram feed, your Pinterest, all of your social media. It follows a very specific algorithm. It feeds you the things that you are interested in. Can you find a common thread of what you're looking at that's something you're interested in from a business perspective?
--:-- Guest: When I left my last corporate job, I was a shell of myself. It took me a while to say, "Okay, maybe I'm just going to blow everything up. I'm going to burn the ships and do something completely different." And I was like, "What do I want to do?" I never landed on something that I felt as passionately about as marketing and branding. It's in my DNA. It's in my blood. I'm one of the very few people who went to school for something and is still doing something in that vein. So it just took me a while. Take a minute. Breathe. And ask, "What do I really love?"
--:-- Guest: No one's asking you to do it for the rest of your life. We don't live in that generation anymore. My parents stayed in their jobs for 30, 40 years. No one's asking you to do that anymore. You have an opportunity to do multiple things. But also don't hop around every year or every six months. Figure out what you really want to do and have your why. What is your why? I do what I do because I want other people to go out and do what they were designed to do with excellence, with impact, to build God's kingdom. That's my ultimate why. That's why I was designed.
--:-- Guest: Just take those baby steps. It doesn't have to be anything massive. Create a vision board. There's nothing wrong with creating a vision board, but have actionable steps to make those things come to life. People will allow you to work for them for free. Believe it or not, they will allow you to do this. Some places will give you a little baby paycheck or some perks. If you think you want to be a sports analyst, go shadow someone for the day. I had so many internships growing up, such fun experiences. I was a DJ one summer because I wanted to be on the radio.
--:-- Host: You're scratching all ones and twos?
--:-- Guest: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. But it was classic rock. I was 18 years old, long, long hair. I worked at a classic rock station. They were like, "Do you even know what classic rock is?" And I was like, "Yeah, I do." So I did it. I was morning drive time radio personality with these old guys. They were like in their 40s, Ryan. They were ancient. They were signposts. I was like, "You guys are so old." And now I'm that age. So I'm like, "Ooh."
--:-- Host: Yeah, I know. My kids the other day made a reference to me being old. I'm 43. I had to stop for a sec because in my head, I'm still a kid. I still think about myself like a kid. I look at my dad, he's 68. He's old. I'm not old. He's old. My kids are looking at me calling me old. I'm like, "I'm still a kid. What are you talking about? I still listen to rap music, you motherfucker." It's just funny how all that works.
--:-- Host: But I think your point is dead on. I really like the idea of if you want to be this other thing, or a hobby, or if you think a hobby could become a side hustle. One of the barriers that I try to break down when I talk to people — especially in suburban America, and I think this is particularly true with men, although it may be true with women, I just deal with a lot more men — is that the idea of a side hustle or a second job feels like they're failing.
--:-- Host: I had a buddy, the sports analyst thing is what picked this up for me. He really loves sports and he likes talking about sports. He's like, "I've always wanted to do an Instagram channel where I broke down games." I think he's a Giants fan or whatever. I was like, "So go do it." He's like, "I don't know." I was like, "Dude, this is the easiest thing in the world for you to do. You need a tripod for your camera. It'll cost you $2 on TikTok. You have everything you need to do analysis of games and throw it up on Instagram and see if people like it."
--:-- Host: Here's the best part. Do it for six months. If no one likes it, guess what you can do? You can just shut it down. And if they like it, this is your favorite thing. And like you said, you could test branding. That's the beauty. I'd love for you to maybe expand on this as we kind of run to the end of our conversation here.
--:-- Host: I sometimes get the sense from people that the permanent nature of what we put online means every single thing needs to be curated and on brand and perfect. When you look at the people who grow the fastest, who have the most influence, the most engagement with their content, they have some of that curated, highly produced stuff. But it is always mixed in with — look at Gary Vaynerchuk. This guy tests more crazy ideas in social media and he just throws it out there. He'll even tell you some of the stuff doesn't work and then he doesn't do it again. And it's still out there. The crazy post that didn't work is still sitting in his feed. But no one cares.
--:-- Host: I don't know that I even have a question coming out of that. I just feel so passionately about just doing something. There's no reason to sit every day with this anxiety and this sense of miss between who you are and who you could be.
--:-- Host: Someone asked me one time — actually, it was my son, my older son. My kids go to a Catholic school. My older son enjoys the faith side of it. My younger son does not. But my older son was asking me, "What do you think hell is? Do you think hell is really like a pit of fire?" I said, "No, I do not." I said, "I think hell is when you get to the gates of St. Peter, the version of you that God intended is standing there waiting for you and you have to measure yourself against it. And hell are the people who look at what they could have been and can't handle the difference." I don't know if that's true or not. That's just the way I visualize it. But the only way to get to be that version of you is to do shit. If you're just sitting in place, it just kills me.
--:-- Guest: Same. Same. I don't sit still. There are moments where I'm like, "Okay, I need a break." I ran this past year. This was my husband's challenge, and I somehow adopted it, along with multiple of our other friends. He was going to run the Spartan trifecta this year. Do you know what the Spartan races are?
--:-- Guest: Okay. So it's like running mixed with all these obstacles. Our goal is to do the trifecta this year. We did the beast this past weekend, which was basically a half marathon with 30 obstacles. So we did that Saturday. Sunday, I was like, "I need a minute. I just need to sit down and veg out for a second." So I did that. Let yourself rest.
--:-- Guest: But if you have an inkling of something that you want to try, ask yourself what's the worst that could happen. What is the worst? Are you okay with that? Are you harming yourself? Are you harming others? If the answer is no, then go try it. Life is too short. You could create something amazingly beautiful that is going to impact other people's lives.
--:-- Guest: Because I took a chance on adopting my husband's goals this year, I have deeper friendships because of it. Our friends did it. This beautiful group of people who I know, if I needed them at 3 or 4 in the morning, they would be here immediately. Without saying yes to something, I don't know if I would have developed those friendships in that manner.
--:-- Guest: Same with the business that I have right now. If I hadn't said yes, then I wouldn't be here. I'd be in another job, not as happy as I am right now. I would be thriving, I know I would be thriving, but not like I am right now. I'm not the richest person on the planet, but I am so rich in happiness and I'm so fulfilled by what I'm doing. I love what I'm doing so much that the money is a byproduct of that. Then I get to use it in different manners to go influence others and build God's kingdom. Win-win. Win-win.
--:-- Guest: Go do something. It's not permanent. If you hate it, just like the example with your friend, do it for six months. If you hate it, shut it down. What did you lose? Nothing. He probably ended up learning more about the industry and someone might end up picking him up for a full-time job on that one day. Be passionate about something. Just anything. Pick something. Be passionate about it and go do it.
--:-- Guest: We've got to stop being so lazy about having a second something. Whether you're passionate about it, having a second passion — that's not a failure. It's because you have something that you want to better yourself as a human being and impact others in a better way. It's a service. Go serve. There's nothing wrong with that. How are you losing? Someone tell me, how are you losing? You're not. You're not.
--:-- Host: No. Well, this has been incredible. I appreciate you. Huge fan. Where can people find more about you, connect with you, and get deeper in your world?
--:-- Guest: Absolutely. I would love to hear more from your audience. What do they want to know about their personal brand, their style, their faith? You can find me on Instagram at bellrape — B-E-L-L-E-R-A-P-E. Yes, that is my last name. I married into it. 21 years going strong, baby. You can find me there. And on my website, it's blueprintbybell.com. I've mounted links in the show notes too. You can connect wherever you're listening or watching. Just scroll down. You'll find those links.
--:-- Host: I highly recommend the connection on both Instagram and your website. It's phenomenal. There's a couple pictures from your clients there. One is the guy with the blue suit. It's a black dude and you got the upshot like a badass car. I was like, "Man, I love that picture. I want to be standing in that picture." I love it. So appreciate you. Thank you so much. And just thank you for the time.
--:-- Guest: Thank you so much, Ryan. I am truly appreciative too. Thank you. This has been so fun.
--:-- Host: Awesome. Thank you. Thank you.
